What my new office can teach you about reinvention and joy

5 months ago we sold our house in the suburbs where we lived for 17 years (!!) and moved into an apartment in Boston.

I took my time setting up my new home office but yesterday, it was all done.

I love how it turned out.

As I was getting ready to lead a virtual session for my Leading Through Change program participants, I realized that this new office is a powerful symbol of the reinvention I’ve gone through during the past 8 years.

Here are 3 essential lessons about reinvention that I learned and want to share with you:

 1. Reinvention is a process of discovering and integrating your many unique dimensions and abilities.

8 years ago, I had only a faint idea of my dimensions and abilities as an artist, speaker, author, and mentor.

There had been hints throughout my career that speaking was something I was great at, but I largely ignored them because speaking didn’t align with the business career I thought I should have.

I’ve always loved to write (and wrote a few books decades ago, before Happier Now and The Awesome Human Project, that you could probably find if you’re sleuthy enough!) But I saw my writing as a side project, not a core dimension of who I was.

My friends and colleagues always came to me for advice, especially at major pivot points in their lives, but I never paused long enough to consider that I had a gift of seeing what is possible for someone and activating them to expand in that direction. Again, I just dismissed this as “something I did”.

After I burned out and lifed-out 8 years ago, I stopped pushing and willing myself to do what I thought I should… probably for the first time in my life.

My burnout forced me to look inside myself. To reflect on what made me feel deeply good, on what gave me a sense of purpose. To ask myself what I really wanted to do and explore.

It also forced me to question the stories I’d believed about myself, like the story that “the responsible thing to do was to be a business or start-up executive”.

This wasn’t an easy process. I wasn’t someone who was good at self-inquiry.

But asking these questions revealed many of my dimensions and gifts that I hadn’t integrated into my life and work in a meaningful way.

If you feel ready for a reinvention, I encourage you to undertake this process of self-inquiry. To ask yourself these kinds of questions. To uncover your unique dimensions and gifts that might have been lying dormant for too long.

When we want to change something in our lives, we tend to look outside: change jobs, move, quit a relationship, start a new one, etc.

And reinvention does involve action and making changes.

But if you want your reinvention to lead to greater fulfillment and sense of purpose, you have to begin within yourself.

Self-inquiry is the foundation of your reinvention. It’s your starting point.

 2. Follow your joy, enthusiasm, and sense of purpose.

I mentor people through major life and career reinventions and a common question I get is: “I know I want to change something, but I don’t know where to begin.”

8 years ago, I didn’t either.

So how did I get from there to here? I followed my joy, enthusiasm, and sense of purpose.

I wanted to share my story and to help other people shift from struggle to thriving. So I began to write about it in my weekly emails, which eventually led to my first book, speaking engagements, leadership workshops, and more.

Every time I would get on stage, I felt an immense, almost boundless life force within myself. It felt like I was fully aligned with what I was meant to do in this lifetime. I experienced pure enthusiasm.

I felt the joy of painting pulling at me from my soul, so I decided to give myself permission to paint.

It wasn’t easy. Just like it’s not easy to write a book or create pretty much anything.

I always feel creative tension and have to contend with self-doubt. Dozens of canvases and drafts have ended up in the garbage.

But even when the steps I took were challenging, I felt enthusiasm, like I was being pulled forward from the inside.

This is how I created my path.

This is how you can create yours.

You don’t have to know exactly where you’re going when you begin.

Follow the pull inside, however faint. Follow your joy, what gives you that magical feeling of being on purpose. Follow your enthusiasm.

The path won’t be linear and it will be challenging — everything meaningful is!

But when you stay true to what feels deeply good and aligned, even the challenges bring you a deep sense of fulfillment.

3. Reinvention requires letting go (and it’s hard!)

As I was putting books on the shelves in my office (there is a big bookcase you can’t see in the photo), I smiled:

My 40 year-old self, 8 years ago, would have dismissed so many of them as strange, not important, or woowoo.

Books on spirituality, mind-body integration, mythology, metaphysics, human design, science of hopefulness.

Sure, there are also neuroscience and psychology books that had informed my initial body of work in happiness, and books on goal-setting, motivation, behavior change. But 70% are new.

I didn’t get a bigger bookshelf – I donated a lot of my old books.

They served their purpose, but they no longer serve my body of work and my being in this present moment. I’ve evolved, how I want to serve others has evolved, and I’ve slowly let go of what no longer serves me.

To evolve into something new, you have to be willing to let go of the familiar narratives, habits, inputs, and interactions that don’t serve you and the future self you want to become.

It’s scary. It’s uncomfortable. It’s uncertain.

But not living a life of integrity in alignment with what feels deeply true and meaningful is scarier.